What does being a worst boy mean? Well, it started as an inside joke between two staff members. Part of the job for our Recovery Technicians is to write nightly notes about the day and how everyone is doing so that all the staff is updated on client progress. It became a pattern for the staff to write about how “the boys were just being the worst today,” or lovingly and jokingly they’d note, “we have the worst boys right now.” But when it comes down to it, being a worst boy really means owning who you are and allowing that to show. A common thread for addicts is not knowing how to be our true selves. That’s part of the draw to alcohol and drugs for many of us; these substances, temporary as it may be, can allow you to connect with yourself and others when you never could sober. That’s why it’s such a special thing to find a place that doesn’t expect you to act a certain way in sobriety. You can be yourself here.
There is no mold to follow when you get sober. The point of sobriety is to create a meaningful life for yourself, and that starts with being brutally honest about who you are and what you’ve done. At Solstice, we want you to learn to love who you are — not change who you are. We want you to make friends with your dark and “worst” side without guilt and shame. The boys have more than enough guilt and shame when they come through the gates and we want them to leave that shit out there! We embrace without judgement and once you join the tribe, it’s forever. You won’t find us circling faces on a page that represent our mood for the day or tip toeing around sensitive topics like Fear and God. What you will find is a group of absolute hopeless addicts and alcoholics from all walks of life, laughing and crying together on their way to finding hope and recovery. To the untrained ear it may sound like a group of men you should call the authorities on — (that did happen once because a client wrote, “Kidnapped, call 911" on our dusty van… Strange night!) — but if you were to sit and listen for a moment you would hear something totally different. You would hear men walking hand in hand through shame, sexual traumas, traumas of war and other deep secrets that, until then, they never thought they could share. We joke that no matter your color, creed or sexual preference, no one is safe — and by that we mean everyone is safe because those titles get thrown out and we are one big fucked-up, dysfunctional family. It may seem at times that we are: obnoxious, loud, rude, taboo, or just over the top. But in reality, we're just not ashamed of who we are and are continuing to work on getting better… and having some damn fun! Because, if you can’t find meaning and fun in recovery, then what’s the point of staying sober?